Intimidation is a major roadblock to success in the job market. It hacks you down. Keeps you down. Here’s how it works: because of it … you don’t. Yes because someone, somewhere said something or gave you a look that instilled fear in you, you don’t. You don’t do the things you need to do to get that job fast.
- You don’t take action.
- You fear looking “unprofessional”.
- You fear that “that’s not how it’s done.”
- You don’t take the bold steps.
- You don’t confidently (but with due humility) explain your achievements: “30% growth in 6 months, 8 new accounts”.
- You feel that because you have no degree, you’re worthless.
- You conclude that because you did just an ‘average’ job – which you may have – you don’t have a place, you can’t be bold.
Because a personnel agency treated you poorly, perhaps were rude or uncomplimentary about your work history and qualifications … you start doubting yourself.
Because a friend said: “You can’t do that!?” (when you mentioned your plan to set up a meeting with a local business leader to explain how you could improve an aspect of his/her business) … you hesitate and then you just don’t do it.
Because the HR Officer was abrupt, aloof and quick to point out your faults … you don’t follow up on your plan to start out the follow-up interview for Admin Manager with this: “Before we start, I’ve prepared a 3 minute presentation: “The 3 biggest admin department melt-downs I’ve solved, and how this may help your business, Jones & Jones.”
You get blocked by fear. You take a conservative approach. You play it safe. You’re passive. You sit and wait instead of ‘going and fetching’. You hope things will happen, instead of making them happen. Who are these people who can make us feel this way? You allow them to of course, but also:
- That HR person who’s aloof. Maybe she’s just insecure. Or longing to be in another job, perhaps to be a lawyer or accountant. But he’s stuck with people. Yuck.
- Or that friend who says: “you can’t do that!” Are they the one unemployed? Or are they rather speaking from their safe little space where all is well for now? Will they pay your bills?
- Or the personnel agent who’s rude. Maybe they’re just stressed over that sales target they’re not making. Or maybe the guy’s wife wears the pants at home and this is his chance to feel powerful.
Should we be intimidated by these people? No. Hack back. If you have a valuable skill – even it it’s just average – then some business, somewhere, will hire you. If you can provide a benefit then offer it confidently, persistently, creatively. Many will say “no” to you. Some may even make you feel intimidated. But in the end someone will say, “Wow, you’ve come just at the right time! When can you start?”
[Note: this is why I’ve added on a Support Group to my member’s-only “Get a Job Fast” programme. So if you become a member of my CareerAndSuccess.info ‘inner circle’ site (now a R75.00 no-brainer) then you can also join the Support Group where you can keep a positive vibe going on. Where you can improve your efforts and engage with others who are applying what they learn. Go to www.careerandsuccess.info for the application form (bottom of the page). Or e-mail me for it.]
Thought of the week: Ethan (my son, Grade 3) comes home with 45 mins homework. And he moans. So I sat with him to do it. We were done in under 10 mins. We made it fast and fun. Makes one wonder what – as adults – we could do if we just had the right guidance, mentor, coach? (BTW, this guy specializes in helping: www.siekin.co.za)